We get mad; we get upset; we cry; we scream; yet nothing changes. Many times in life, things do not go the way we want. Sometimes we do not even know what we want. I might sound pessimist to many but the truth is “life is not fair” and the sooner we realize the better it is.

It’s good to be positive. I mean it’s really awesome to believe “There is a better tomorrow”, “Everything happens for good”, but what if it’s not. What if there is no better tomorrow? Now “better” can mean different thing to different people. But the point is how long will one wait for a better tomorrow? And if that tomorrow never comes – what then? Get mad, get upset, cry, scream, again? Seriously nothing is going to change even then.

Many things that happen is not in our power. At times we cannot change things for better. Obviously we do not know what happens tomorrow therefore there is no point assuming either it will be good or bad. It might be better, it might be the same or it might be worse. What I am saying does not mean, we should not try for better. We should always work on making things better. All I am saying is, maybe we need to take a different approach to life.

Many years back, things weren’t going very well with me. Or at least that’s what I used to think. I remember trying to convince myself saying, things will be better. Waited for sometime, only to realize – things were either the same or sometimes worse. I would be sad, depressed and was always looking for something better, or lets say looking for happiness.

Then one fine day, out of the blue I realized something that changed my life. What if what I am looking for is not there? I realized I couldn’t sit and wait for happiness. I realized I couldn’t go around searching for happiness. That’s when I took a step and took a different approach to life. I did not give up; lets not confuse my statement. I simply made peace with myself. Instead of wasting my time finding happiness and running away from the troubles, I worked myself into finding “The Balance”.

28 yrs. of my life and I am not a millionaire. I am not a Harvard graduate. I am not an extraordinary person to the society. However, I am that one thing that’s the most important of all. I learned to live my life in an extraordinarily happy way. I became an extraordinary person to myself. I realized an important key to being happy. I found “The One” person that can make me happy and that one person is “ME”.

Instead of looking for happiness everywhere, I learned to find happiness in everything that comes along. I have finally realized, nobody can make me happy if I do not want to be happy myself. Sometimes, people get confused when I say, “ I simply want to be happy”. People ask me, what does happiness mean to you? Or do you know what will make you happy? I think happiness is very simple, but we tend to make it complicated. When I say, I simply want to be happy, all I mean is I am just happy for whatever it is. I do not mean I am looking for something that will make me happy.

I have started to accept everything that comes along. When things don’t go the way it’s supposed to, I deal with it in the best way possible. When things go right, I still deal with it in the best way possible. Nothing makes me super happy or supper sad no more. Happiness and sadness comes and goes. So instead of being over happy or over sad, I am simply at norm. Nothing is really a big deal.

Life is not completely black or white. It has its share of black and white. I should probably take my words back – life is actually fair. Fair, meaning in between. If there were no night, day would not have had a value. And if you think night is nothing but darkness, look at the stars, and darkness will have a whole new meaning to it. Instead of searching for happiness or trying to run away from sadness, try to find that “YOU” inside you who knows how to be OK with everything that comes along. If happiness or sadness is the question, the only answer is “The Balance”.

Nisha Pradhan

Irving, Texas

12/28/2010